It might feel a bit like talking about Christmas in June, but the school year really does start as soon as they finish the previous one. This is knowledge I have only gained having experienced it first-hand as a parent.
If you have fond memories of the new school year that include the scent of bouquets of freshly sharpened pencils and new notebooks, then erase that from your mind. Starting reception as a parent is a whole new and less olfactory experience.
In July I scoffed at the supermarkets with their uniforms out as soon as the summer holidays started, and M&S with all their offers saying: “they will have them on all summer”. Oh, how naïve I was.
If, like me, your little one is a while away from being five, you will need to buy aged 4-5 year clothes and these sell out really fast. I have a girl that wanted to wear dresses, and these were almost impossible to find in shops and online in August. It ended up with me having a mad scramble to M&S and getting lucky that they had one two-pack of summer dresses in her size and in the right colour for school. By this point, the offers had firmly stopped. Those are for the savvy July shoppers.
The colours, so many yet so few. Some schools are stricter than others. Some state certain colours, some want you to buy their branded items, and others sell patches to stitch on (or glue on, as who has time to sew).
Standing in M&S in August I was in panic mode. The fear of the sell-out happening in Autumn led to me buying more winter-style items, which were quite frankly a waste of time as infant schools are HOT. A load of sweaty kids in a little room probably constructed in either Victorian times or the 1970s, I promise you they are not getting cold.
So, you nail the clothes, and socks and have totally forgotten about the P.E. kit, you head for shoes. All schools differ again here. I got lucky as they could wear what they want on their feet, so the trainers she had were just fine. If you do need school shoes, then try not to leave them until the bank holiday weekend in August. Shoe shopping is unpleasant at the best of times. Buying school shoes on a busy weekend when the likelihood is they will have sold out in the size you need, is no one’s idea of a good time. Save yourself the stress and buy some cheap ones online to try. I find H&M offer great value for these types of shoe-based emergencies.
If your school does like the children to have branded items you will be given an order form at an open day, or it will be sent to you along with lots of other information about starting school. The theme of this article should be to order everything in July, as it will apply to these bits too. Most of them offer free delivery if you order early and let’s face it, you don’t need to be driving to an industrial estate the week before school starts to pick up anything or pay massive amounts in delivery charges.
The other thing to do is to see if the PTA is having a uniform sale before the term starts, or as the term starts and hold off buying new. These items are usually in fantastic condition as they have been hardly worn in the sweatbox, or have sat in the lost property bin for 12 months having been lost in the first week.
Name badges are a must. Put their name on EVERYTHING. Where I can I have taken to putting my phone number on the label too which has resulted in things finding their way back to us a lot easier. Try and get the ones you can stick in, or iron in, but a permanent marker will also do the job. You will need name badges on water bottles, bookbags, rucksacks, PE bags, wellies, and everything else you will find yourself needing.
Now you have sorted the little one with their new wardrobe, and taken their picture on their first day as you leave the house, you will spend the next week not knowing if you are coming or going, dropping off and picking up said small child from school and receiving 300 emails from their admin team.
By October half term I was really feeling that the mental load was getting a bit much so I did a couple of things that really helped. I made sure my partner was on the email list too. He has a much more relaxed attitude that complements my more people-pleasing, competitive one. He just likes to remind me that she will not be scarred for life if I do not send her in a fully homemade pirate outfit with one week’s notice.
The other was to stop worrying about being late. I am not saying that you should be late, but pressure of being on time means you can find yourself leaving the house every day shouting “We are going to be late!” and throwing yourself into a tizzy and making small people grumpy. Take a moment to remember it really does not matter if they are 10 minutes late. No one is going to tell you off (well you might get a stern letter if you do it every day, but no one will do it to your face), and the small person will not self-combust if they have to go via the office. You will feel sane and your day will be a lot better because let’s face it, all this has happened before 9am.
The other thing I did was set boundaries around after-school snacks. Some parents bring loads, some bring nothing. What is important is that you set your boundaries with your small person for what is acceptable for your family. The boundaries allow you to avoid a meltdown due to them wanting what someone else has, which is obviously going to be a million times worse as they will be hungry and tired.
Your child starting school is enormous and can be an emotional time. If you can take time off to help with the transition, yours, and theirs, then you might find it helpful. It is a monumental milestone and just another wild ride on this journey. Remember to enjoy this first year because it really does fly by and before you know it, they are heading into year 1 and you are remembering to buy the school clothes in July.
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Written by Victoria Cobley
Victoria is a Freelance journalist and content creator with two children aged 5 and 2.
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